TOURIST GUIDE TO SOUTH AFRICA

Welcome to the future of South Africa. The year is 2010. This is a sketch of the future as seen from the hopeful eyes of 2006.
	Ag, well not much has changed, ja. the sunsets are heavenly, the weather is perfect, the animals are wild, the food is better quality than anywhere, with more variety than anywhere, more cost effectively than anywhere. Koos Van Der Merwe has taken first place in the national Cheetah racing championships, with his latest two year old tomcat, Spot XIII, doing the 400 meters in 9.32 seconds. Getting close to the world record for Cheetah racing. Well done Koos.
Lion wrestling has taken on a new dimension, Vleis Van Tonder has become the first world champion to wrestle 5 lions into submission on the same day. Schalk Hamburger only managed two lions on a tough day for the Springbok Lion wrestling team Amalocoloco.
Southern Africa has a new game reserve. We just put a fence around Zimbabwe.
2010 is the first year that we have no road deaths. Mainly due to the advent of new intercity and intra city airborne taxis. The first ever airborne public transport system is completely computerized and only a few vintage cars still roam the streets, mostly just for the use of nostalgic old people and the occasional Zimbabwean.
Elephant soccer remains the most popular sport for spectators, while Giraffe surfing has become a favorite for young daredevils and visiting spaniards bored with being bored by bulls. While fighting a Leopard for a springbok calf remains the domain of the Botswana team, after they defeated Swaziland in the final this year.
Once more the Japanese are dominant in world rugby thanks to sumo wrestlers in the front row. Until the rest of the world can catch up to the pushing power of four sumo wrestlers, South Africa will continue to lose the rugby world cup final by such margins as 65 to 12 to Japan.
Since the cure of Aids was discovered to simply be the cessation of behavior known to deplete the immune system, the economy has surpassed that of China with a growth rate of 23% by the end of 2010.
Bafana Bafana under the eye of the Chief of coaches himself Jomo Sono, have beaten Brazil by 7 goals to nil in a warm up to the world cup. In their new red yellow and green strip, the South Africans look invincible on home soil.
With unemployment at 1% and crime virtually unheard of since the normalization of the drug trade, South Africans have become a nation of gardeners, growing all manner of plants in the massive National Botanical Gardens project which employs millions to turn South Africa into the healing Eden itself, using all manor of natural herbs, growing in the wild.
South Africa introduces the R1000 coin, made of gold into public usage. Previous crime rates made this a bad idea back in the 20th century.
The laws of rugby change. A drop goal now must be scored under the posts, and a penalty is minus 1 point, no kick at posts, then a free kick to the opposition. A try is 3 points, a conversion 2 points, under the posts. Players may defend the kicks at goal.
Voetstoets Visagie mesmerizes the Japanese sumo wrestling forwards, with a dazzling display of rugby-soccer skills, anticipating each bounce, like a bat using sonar, Voetstoets Visagie out dribbles his oversized opposition to lead South Africa to a memorable 77-42 win over Japan in the final of the Try-nations event, which includes a distant third place to Australia.
The rules of soccer change, so that the forward must have clear daylight between him and the defender to be in an offside position. France defeat Italy 8-3 in a warm up to the finals.
Antarctica win the world bicycle flying championships held on table mountain.
A List of the 100 most popular people ever Seating arrangements for Judgement Day.

.



.

. A local's tourist map to South Africa and guide to the 9 unofficial provinces .

2010-SOUTH-AFRICA.NET ... DEVELOPED BY ... WWW.POSEIDONS.NET .

JUNE 2010

 

< TOP OF PAGE >