Load shedding
In response to David Bullard of the Sunday Times, 27th January 2008, article entitled, 'Knuckleheads at the ANC ought to take some responsibility'.
Common Sense 201, multiple choice examination question 1. The world you live in is facing destruction due to global warming, should you:

A) Build more hot power stations.
B) Build fewer power stations.
C) Expect empowered people to invest in solar power instead of 4x4's.
D) Pay the newspapers an 'advertising' kickback to print your story.

A fairly simple question and in case you're still puzzling over the answer, both B and C amount to the same thing. I won't call you a rude name, because you recently were shot in a terrible part of your anatomy. My intuition, though, is that was a deliberate attempt to chase you out of the country as your opinions are often misconstrued as being Afro-pessimist. Personally I think you are just a common garden variety pessimist, so further insulting you will do you no good.

Shouldn't we take up the initiative and tell FIFA that we are not interested in football as much as saving the planet, our society from crime, and Zimbabwe from itself?
Here are some suggestions that make perfect sense, but if the government tried to implement them, then all the kaalbaard kortbroeke and kortbaard kaalbroeke would whinge and whine and possibly try to start a race war, again. (They have not won a single one, ever, so this would just be genocidal suicide, again)
These are the following tax increases that www.poseidons.net proposes:
4x4's for non-farmers
100%
private vehicles for families without minors
10%
TV adverts repeated more than once per day
50%
movies
50%
alcohol
100%
tobacco (I should cut down)
100%
legal marijuana (to hell with the home-growers)
100%
'professional music' concerts (amateurs amuse us more )
100%
quad bikes
400%
ice-cream vendors who use a bell to sell their poison
200%
restaurant meals above R50 per meal
50%
heated swimming pools without solar heating
100%
Jacuzzis
200%
economy class flights
50%
people whose dogs bark incessantly after 2 warnings per year
200%
traffic fines
100%
speeding fines
200%
divorce lawyers
300%
university (not technicons)
100%
private schools
20%
chocolate and sweets
200%

broadband internet for non-computer professionals (IE porno pervs)
200%
bread (mielie pap is healthier)
20%
TV sets
100%
video rental
20%
psychiatry (not psychology)
100%
professional sport (an oxymoron, kids are more sporting)
100%
art and music courses
100%
beauty salons and barbers
200%
fines for internet and telephone spam
1000%
printed newspapers with more than 20% adverts
200%
other printed newspapers
20%
clothing above R200 per item
200%
motor racing
300%
recreational power boats (not yachts)
100%
firearm ammunition (not the weapon itself)
1000%
non free computer games and consoles
200%
drunk driving fines
1000%
private lawyers
200%
cosmetic surgery (not dental)
500%

Should there be any whining or whinging, then just include the following additional taxation :
Non South African Zimbabweans
100%
Non South African Americans
50%
Non South African Australians
50%
Non South African Dutchmen
50%
Non South African French
50%
Non South African Italians
50%
Non South African Scandinavians
50%
Non South African Germans
100%
Non South African Japanese
100%
Non South African New Zealanders
200%
Gautengers (coat hangers as they hang on to the coat tails of the rich)
20%
Durbanites
20%
Capetonians
50%
Homosexual men
100%
Unmarried women over 26
25%
The Mail and Guardian
500%
divorce women per childless divorce
100%
people who earn more than R20 000 per month
1% per R1000
people who think we need daylight saving time
2000%

All this money could be used to subsidize the following:
Solar and Wind power
reduced by 75%
dial-up internet
50%
Bibles in African languages
50%
Bibles in European languages
25%
olive oil
50%
New black farmers (less than 21 years in the field)
50%
New white farmers (less than 21 years in the field)
25%
Ornithopters using the pixiwing design
90%
mielie pap
50%
vitamins
50%
dentistry
50%
pharmacy
20%
Adult literacy
50%
Maths teachers (not from Rhodes university)
90%

It really is the imperative of conscious white people to make this our agenda for one simple reason : when global warming hits, it will be we who suffer first, not those with the privilege of abundant melanin.

However, once the sea levels rise, well, we all know who cannot swim because they are afraid of the water, thus it will hit them a bit later. So when Lake Botswana starts to fill up, it will be too late. And where will they get their Mercedes and BMW's from when Germany starts to disappear below the waves?

Bullard, your column is often well written, and you are probably the only journalist who manages to balance humor with serious content. All that other redundant junk after your section would be completely unread if it were not for you. As it is 90% of the time it is just a waste of energy, and would cost very little to just link it to a website.

Please, for the love of the planet (and your melanin deficiency) print this. Alter it. Don't pay me. Just pay attention to common sense 201. Take some responsibility for this, or prove yourself worse than a mere pessimist.

More attitude from www.2010-south-africa.net